Teach the children

Big sisters and big brothers have a big responsibility.  At least this is what I was trying to instill in my children today.


Sunshine was the first to wake up this morning and we were having a little bit of Mommy alone/heart to heart kind of time.  I tell her how much I love her, what a good girl she is, how proud I am of her.  Then I tell her that there's one thing I don't like that makes me sad.  I told her it makes me sad how she and Monkey are always fighting.  This is about how the conversation goes:


"Sunshine, I love you so much.  Why do you and Monkey fight so much though?"


"Sometimes he just does things he's not supposed to do and is naughty."  (Says the pot about the kettle.)


"Did you know that everything that you do, you teach Bug?  You're teaching him to fight and pick on his big brother and sister.  Did you know that?"


"No."


"He loves you and thinks you're wonderful and you love him.  You don't want him to think that it's OK to yell and fight with you do you?  You don't want him to someday start teasing you do you?"


"Will he get put in time out?"


Aaahhh... my rule follower... things always must be fair and equal.


"Do you want him to go in time out?"


"If he's not being nice he should."


Not quite the result I was hoping for.


Later that day, mostly to show Sunshine that this responsibility wasn't solely on her shoulders, I talked to Monkey.  Talking to Monkey is often difficult anyways, keeping his attention is similar to catching a single dandelion seed.  So after yet another argument with Sunshine I talked to Monkey, this was our "conversation".


"You know Monkey, Bug watches everything that you and Sunshine do.  He learns from what you do."


nothing


"When you tease and fight with Mary, he's going to start to think that it's ok to tease and fight.  He loves you and looks up to you.  If he teases and fights with you won't that make you sad?"


"No."


Let's try a different approach.  "If you keep teaching these things, he's going to do them and he's going to get in trouble, too.  You don't want him to get in trouble do you?"


"Yes."


"You do?"


"Yes.  No."


*Sigh* So much for that angle.  I don't even think he was listening, the mismatched socks he was looking at during this were apparently very interesting.


I suppose they'll figure it out when cute little Bug hauls off and hits one of them back and tells the other to back off.

Vicky